When I was deciding on the destination for my exchange, in first year I was dead set on going to China. Beijing was my place, it was my city, and ultimately, it was home.
I don't think people realize how difficult it was of a decision for me to not choose China. To not choose China, means not choosing family, it means not choosing somewhere that I have wanted to be in and somewhere that I feel like I belong to since for ever. I have forever just focused on this one place that I have wanted to be in since I sometimes do feel out of touch with this other side of me. I feel that I am out of touch with who I am and who I should be even though I have lived in Canada all my life. I don't know what it means to be Canadian or Chinese or just whatever. I thought that going back to China for exchange and to be in a fully Chinese environment around people with ages similar to mine would help me really find who I am and if that is a country that I want to go back to and stay in the long term.
However, this was also my chance to branch out. It was the chance to really push myself outside my comfort zone. Why would I go to to a country that I knew the language of, that I somewhat knew the customs of, and somewhere that was honestly half an hour from my home. If I ever wanted to know what my limits and boundaries are as a human being, this was the time to stretch myself to the max. To throw myself into a completely unknown country, and to see if I'm able to sink or swim. I like challenging myself, and I like learning about myself. I like going to foreign countries and just dive right in. I know it will be tough, especially for an introvert like me, but it is something that I know I want to be able to do for the future. I will work abroad in the future, and if I am not able to adapt to that country and to the people there, why would anyone want to work with me?
When it came to choosing countries, I knew what I wanted and I knew what I didn't want. I know I didn't anywhere in South American or Australia. I didn't want anywhere in Asia (because really), and I wanted to backpack Europe. I wanted to see this world, this vast world, and I wanted to see the other people that lived in this expansive world. I am tiny. I am miniscule. But, I want to see. I have this hunger for adventure, for movement, for change, and for opportunity.
In the end my short list consisted of Mannheim in Germany, Rotterdam in the Netherlands, St.Gallen in Switzerland, and Bath in the UK. The major reason that I chose Germany was that, hey, Germany's economy is booming, why shouldn't I go? Why shouldn't I go to the best university in Germany to learn about another culture, learn about another race, and to learn about myself? This is my challenge to myself. To live and record my days in Germany, in which I am completely alone in a foreign country. I will bring y'all along on this venture, on this exploration.
I am not a box. I am a sparkly unicorn. I want to be adaptable, and I want to be flexible. I want to be someone that will affect and influence others. I want to grow. I want to learn. I want to challenge myself.
See y'all soon. More Germany posts will come.
♚ Yushi
No comments:
Post a Comment